for BigTrial.net
It was the equivalent of a major league baseball manger coming out while his team was suffering through an epic losing streak and saying hey, wait a minute, folks, there's a silver lining here.
Our shortstop who bats ninth in the lineup has finally raised his batting average above .190. And hey, he's even looking a little more aggressive at the plate. So things are really looking up here.
But hey Skip, we've lost our last 23 games in a row, and you don't still don't have a stinkin' clue how to turn this thing around.
In the middle of a record homicide epidemic, beleaguered Police Commissioner Danielle Outlaw called a press conference this morning to throw around some meaningless statistics in an attempt to find a silver lining. She did it in the midst of the latest outbreak of gun violence that featured a brazen execution in broad daylight yesterday afternoon in the Lowe's parking lot down in South Philly.
While Outlaw conceded that the record number of dead bodies piling up in the streets was "especially shameful and sickening," she wanted everyone to know, "We are working very diligently and passionately toward the goal of a safer Philadelphia."
